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Catharsis

                                        Catharsis
She was running with a fast pace, her  brain  racing along.  She somehow wanted to  rein in her agitating  mind.The gym did  not help.The desert in  her heart raised the mist which seemed to be choking her.   She  was fearing whether  she would   ever be able to thaw  her  heart which had turned as hard as the rock of Gibraltar  , indifferent to human emotions. The garden around her was in full  bloom.It was spring.
It was spring when she had  met Amit a suave  and graceful boy who with his somber voice  and attractive persona stole her heart. She was quite a bindas  girl and engrossed in her world of  books  and academics. But Amit took hold of her imagination and all her  dream  characters got morphed into this one character who breathed and enlivened the ambience around her.She got wrapped up by him like the silk worm in its cocoon.She was not a worldly wise girl who could balance equitably her own interests and her  total immersion in the identity of Amit.She was raw and  her love  at  nascent   stage. She invested in him not only her emotions but put herself at the mercy of his  manipulative responses.   He pulled at her strings and she danced to his tunes.She was the reed filled with the love notes of her satyr.The days flew and her  dreams burnished.The Gulmohar and the white flower bunches of acacia bloomed in the air giving wings to her . She built  castles in the air .There was no care for who spent where and what. But gradually she  noticed  that the man was  quite  stingy when he had to spend on her. He had a marvellous sense of justifying the uselessness of overspending  when it happened to be she. .But she took it in her stride as the normal hiccups in such an informal  relationship.She let the clouds mist her eyes and floated in the fairy romance of Cinderella  and the princess of  The Sleeping Beauty .Sometimes the clouds darkened but she wafted through them into the delicate silken web of juvenile love and romance.The man was adept at such games.He loosened the dor of patang and let her soar hanging on the strings.  She withdrew from the world and somehow he became the receptacle of all her human emotions.Like the blazing Sun her love  got condensed in that one incandescence that was he.  The man rejoiced and to some extent was indulgent.His neo-sophistication had rendered him quite  pliable.  
He was there with his clawed in  hands knotted and twisted but  well   manicured and his  downcast looks were A avoiding her eyes..He seemed to be in a hurry.He had to leave abroad and she was there before him with her blazing eyes and  bewildered  expression .He was telling her that they were not compatible for each other  and with a nervous and sneering haste he wanted to disentangle himself and was eager to leave the place. She looked at him in a dazed manner  and was the  first to leave  the venue without looking back.
She had finished her running .she would go and have her  hair cut because they had grown unruly since she hardly paid any attention to them lately but they came over her eyes which annoyed her. Today she thought of visiting her  siblings .She felt the clang of the iron in her soul . Suddenly the  face of her sister came before her eyes. She recalled  one incident. Her little  sister was engrossed in something in her hand. She asked her what she was doing .She said that she had borrowed some wool from her aunt  and  would knit her a scarf. Those were the hard days for them and her little sister too lacked in sufficient warm clothing. After a long time she felt a stab at her heart and her eyes moistening,  she  suddenly  broke into a sob. She desperately wanted to hug her sister.
She felt something melting inside her,  only she could not see it, it was the   muck .It flowed and she felt light. Was that the catharsis then?


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